{"product_id":"scurvy-t-shirt","title":"Scurvy T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eScurvy: When Life Doesn't Give You Lemons\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eSome people get lemons. Pirates get scurvy. Such is life on the high seas.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThis premium black t-shirt celebrates history's most preventable cause of death — the one where sailors literally fell apart because nobody thought to pack fruit. Featuring a skeleton pirate who clearly didn't get the memo about Vitamin C, leaning against a barrel and raising a tankard to his own spectacular demise.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThe box says it all: \u003cem\u003eVitamin C? Nowhere to be found.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003ePerfect for history buffs, nautical enthusiasts, and anyone who's ever eaten badly for weeks and felt vaguely piratical about it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhy you need this shirt:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul class=\"[li_\u0026amp;]:mb-0 [li_\u0026amp;]:mt-1 [li_\u0026amp;]:gap-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ul]:pb-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ol]:pb-1 list-disc flex flex-col gap-1 pl-8 mb-3\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eBecause scurvy is funnier in hindsight\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eBecause \"eat your fruit\" hits different when the alternative is your teeth falling out\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eBecause the Royal Navy took 200 years to figure out limes, and we should never let them forget it\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eA genuine piece of Wild History — where the past is always stranger, darker, and more ridiculous than they taught you in school.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e100% cotton. Built to outlast any ocean voyage — probably.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"mysite","offers":[{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":54045135569109,"sku":"2205899_11576","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":54045135601877,"sku":"2205899_11577","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":54045135634645,"sku":"2205899_11578","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":54045135667413,"sku":"2205899_11579","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":54045135700181,"sku":"2205899_11580","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":54045135732949,"sku":"2205899_12650","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":54045135765717,"sku":"2205899_12651","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 5XL","offer_id":54045135798485,"sku":"2205899_12652","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":54045135831253,"sku":"3955498_11546","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":54045135864021,"sku":"3955498_11547","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":54045135896789,"sku":"3955498_11548","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":54045135929557,"sku":"3955498_11549","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":54045135962325,"sku":"3955498_11550","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":54045135995093,"sku":"3955498_12644","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":54045136027861,"sku":"3955498_12645","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":54045136060629,"sku":"3955498_12646","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":54045136093397,"sku":"3955498_11561","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":54045136126165,"sku":"3955498_11562","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":54045136158933,"sku":"3955498_11563","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":54045136191701,"sku":"3955498_11564","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":54045136224469,"sku":"3955498_11565","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":54045136257237,"sku":"3955498_12653","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":54045136290005,"sku":"3955498_12668","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":54045136322773,"sku":"3955498_12669","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ S","offer_id":54045136355541,"sku":"3955498_11571","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ M","offer_id":54045136388309,"sku":"3955498_11572","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ L","offer_id":54045136421077,"sku":"3955498_11573","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ XL","offer_id":54045136453845,"sku":"3955498_11574","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ 2XL","offer_id":54045136486613,"sku":"3955498_11575","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ 3XL","offer_id":54045136519381,"sku":"3955498_12647","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ 4XL","offer_id":54045136552149,"sku":"3955498_12648","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ 5XL","offer_id":54045136584917,"sku":"3955498_12649","price":25.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0803\/7259\/6949\/files\/hero_product_image_-_2026-05-23T040132.962_9636a363-480a-4fc8-9d9d-a8e8f035f83c.jpg?v=1781589382","url":"https:\/\/historitees.com\/products\/scurvy-t-shirt","provider":"Historitees","version":"1.0","type":"link"}